...I think romance is under-rated. (34 do-able romantic gestures)

You know those powerful scenes in romantic comedies where the person runs out into the middle of a baseball field to profess their love, or where they get up in front of a huge crowd and steal the mic to confess their feelings, or when they have their buddies sing backup in a bar to get the girl? Even if you're a guy, you have to admit it's easy to get caught up in those moments and think, "Why can't that happen to me!?" Well, it can. You might have to be the one to orchestrate it, but you most certainly can make your love story THAT awesome.

Will it make you feel embarrassed? Take you out of your comfort zone? Maybe make you feel like a total dork for trying to do something so cliché and hokey? OF COURSE. But that's the point. I've never known someone to have an amazing relationship by accident. It takes work. You have to put yourself out there and make those big movie-scene moments happen. I think that many couples just simply forget how important it is to court each other over the years. You might even start to get a little bitter thinking of the list of sweet things your partner doesn't do anymore (or never did). If you find yourself in that position, consider the fact that maybe you have stopped participating in the romance as well. It's just you and your partner building your relationship- if you don't make it epic, who is going to?

You have to start somewhere, so this list is going to start from everyday simple gestures, then work up to those really big life changing gestures. You'll also see some that are geared more towards men, and others will be specifically for women. Romance means something a little different to everyone, but I think the common ground everyone can agree on is that the most romantic gestures are the ones that show your partner that you value them.



Level 1: Easy-Peasy

1. Change her oil. Women have a hard time realizing something like this is actually a way men show they care, so ladies: now you know. He does it out of love. It might not be the chocolates you were hoping for, but especially for a guy who shudders at the L-word it's a good start.
2. Text something complimentary. I'm not talking about sexting here. I mean nice, sweet things that let them know you're thinking about them, looking forward to their company, seeing their lovely face, and that you apreciate them. "Have a great day, handsome!", "Love ya, beautiful!", and "Can't wait to see you! xoxo" are perfect!
3. Leave notes. In pockets, purses, wallets, gloveboxes...you can even wad one up and put it in their shoe so they don't find it until they try to put their shoes on.
4. Stop what you're doing, smile, and say "I just love you".
5. Use a dry-erase marker to write some things you love about them on the shower wall (or mirror).
6. E-mail a continuation of that list to them.
7. Mail them letters and cards. For Valentine's day, anniversaries, or just because. People forget how great it feels to get a real letter in the mail. There's something incredibly personal about it that you just don't get by posting it to Facebook.
8. Change their screen-saver to a sweet message.
9. Say, "Thank You". Seems easy enough, but if she has your dinner ready, you don't have to search for socks because they're already paired, and your stuff is always put away for you...that takes work! Same thing goes for the ladies: if he holds the door, washes his dishes, and puts gas in your car for you...those things were all done as an act of courtesy and love. Don't you dare take it for granted!
10. Make a big deal out of your partner. To your parents, their parents, friends, and especially to coworkers. Unless you're out to make them look bad, why woud you say anything but their praises? If he opens the door for you in public, give a kiss on the cheek and say outloud,"What a gentleman.".  And when she's off feeding the baby, tell whoever you're with,"She's a great mom."

Level 2: Some Effort

1. Make dinner. If you don't normally cook any effort you make, even if it's a pre-packaged meal, is appreciated. If you fail miserably, it becomes a good story and you end up with takeout. Either way, you win.
2. Get their favorite movie, gather blankets, and make popcorn.
3. Make dinner TOGETHER. That means not sitting on the couch while she's cooking. And that also means asking him to come help you chop veggies (ask in a nice way!). Bonding over food is stereotyped as an overweight people thing, but in reality it's a great, relaxed segway to easy conversations. And who knows, the conversation might, for example, lead the two of you to start a healthy-eating plan together, which could lead to a fitness pact, which will only further build your relationship.
4. Make a movie date at a drive-in theater!
5. Clean the house. At minimum, Frebreeze everything and just straighten up a little.
6. Run them a hot bath, with candles and music. Another thing that's considered "hokey" is candles, but don't be fooled. As much as we want to pretend it doesn't matter, having someone take the time to not only run a hot bath but also light some candles (especially scented candles) so you can really relax is priceless! Don't have a bath? Run their shower, same principle!
7. Make a mixed CD. And then put it in their car so it plays when they start up in the morning!
8. Work out together. Go for a walk, or do an all-out fitness routine.
9. Surprise them with flowers. Women can do it, too...might not be a good idea to show up at work with a bouquet, but having them in the center of the table with a little card attached is nice for anyone.
10. Make them something. Everyday example: when you're at a fast food restaurant use your napkin or straw wrapper to make a ring or flower. Special Occasions: Let out your inner artist- make a card out of construction paper, clay heart change dish, or even a little aluminum foil person holding a paper heart. This one sound corny, too? It is. But that's how you make love fun!
11. After a movie date, stick around for the credits. The first semi-danceable song that comes on, get up and dance together on the theater floor. Even if people are still there.
12. Give a neck rub. When you're just sitting together watching TV, right before bed, whenever you get a chance. Add in a scalp massage (fingers through the hair) too.
13. Involve the pets. Write a little note and tie it to their collar, or take a photo with the dog holding the note in their mouth, and text it to them.
14. Leave a post-it note in the book they're reading.
15. Do the Love Dare. The movie Fireproof was about a couple on the brink of divorce, and the journal is written with religious contexts, but the lessons are universal and your relationship doesn't have to be on the rocks to benefit from it! Here is an abbreviated version of this 40 day dare, but trust me, the journal is worth every penny!
16. Get them a Sweet Little Something! That's a shameless plug for my personal business. I specialize in custom mementos. You can't go wrong with unique gifts.

Level 3: Plan Ahead

1. Plan a dinner date. Make the reservations, get dressed up....and maybe clean out your car for it...meaning get the carseat and toys out, get the trash out of the floorboards, and put an air freshener in!
2. Make a slideshow. Whatever occasion (Mother's/Father's Day, Valentine's Day, anniversary), string together memorable photos and add captions or quotes. If a poem or song lyrics fit the occasion add those one line per photo.
3. Put an love announcement in the local paper. Something along the lines of, "To the most amazing person I know, (insert name): Thank you for choosing me."
4. Arrange for a "secret admirer". You can get co-workers, family, and friends to help with this one. Have them sneak flowers and candy and little handwritten notes signed "secret admirer" into your partners desk at work or other places for them to find. After about a week of "secret admirer gifts", let them know it's you with a nice dinner and a handwritten note just like the one's they've been receiving that says, "It's no secret, I admie you."
5. Have your buddies sing backup at a bar. Maverick style. Some places (like Joe's Crab Shack) have staff and waiters who will gladly sing backup for you, and all you have to do is ask!

Level 4: Orchestrate

1. Plan a night-time picnic. This means you might need help, possibly even a small portable generator or battery. Drape white Christmas lights over a tree, have a small table and chair set up with candles ready to light, and pack a lukewarm or cool dinner (sandwiches, wraps, etc.) Bring a blanket to sit on, and stargaze while the food settles.
2. Set up a GeoCaching scavenger hunt! GeoCaching is a free real-world outdoor treasure hunt. Players try to locate hidden containers, called geocaches, using a smartphone or GPS and can then share their experiences online. A friend's husband did this for her for their anniversary and I've been envious since!
3. Do the "walking out onto the baseball diamond to profess your love" thing! You might not be able to do it at Wrigley field, but you can most certainly do it at a local school ball game! You'll need to contact the principal, and (s)he'll put you in contact with the right people that can give you the mic during halftime at a football game, basketball game, or before a baseball game. You'll also have to come up with a good reason for getting your date to go to a school ball game (maybe volunteer for the concession stand or find a friend who has a kid playing on the team). You can absolutely make this one happen with a little planning and a lot of guts!

Do you have something that you think should make the list? Please leave it in a comment ;)