...I think I successfully achieved baby led weaning from exclusive pumping.

I know, sounds kinda strange....how can you let baby self wean from the breast if you aren't breast feeding?  If it doesn't sound strange to you, you may not be familiar with what either "exclusive pumping" or "baby led weaning" are. So, let me break it down for you before I get into how I did it.

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-Exclusive pumping is when a mother, by choice or necessity, uses pumped/hand expressed breast milk to feed her baby through a bottle or other necessary means (g-tube, etc.). This is a very real alternative to breast feeding or formula feeding!

-Baby led weaning is listening and watching for baby's natural cues to tell you when they are ready to stop nursing, as opposed to setting a deadline (say their 1st birthday, or 18 months old) to start weaning. This method allows baby to self-feed from the beginning, rather than introducing foods on a schedule or deadline. Baby led weaning has been the topic of some pretty heated discussion in the last few years because some babies are ready to wean at 12-18 months, while others may not show these signs until well after their 3rd birthday and beyond. It truly depends on the individual child, but the point is that, with BLW, this line of communication isn't being ignored or set aside in lieu of what is convenient or socially accepted as a norm for the parent.

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So, when my kiddo was born I completely intended to breastfeed until she weaned herself. I had no clue as to what cues she would give me to let me know she was ready to wean, but that was still always my plan. However, I was quick to learn that no plan of mine was very important in the grand scheme of things. Breast feeding was just one of the first things I found I had no control over.

What went wrong in my plan, exactly? Well, hindsight being 20/20, I should never have introduced a nipple shield. Those things have their place and time, but my situation simply did not call for one and if I had known nearly as much then as I do now I would absolutely NOT have used one. It created irreversible nipple confusion and the babe just wouldn't nurse like I'd planned, despite weekly visits to a Lactation Consultant and a hydro-therapy that was supposed to reset the whole breastfeeding relationship. She needed the feel of plastic to feel comfortable eating. I knew enough about the benefits of breastfeeding to feel confident in making the decision to avoid formula. That led to me being an exclusive pumper.

As an exclusive pumping momma we sometimes have a hard time finding where we fit in. We're stuck between wanting to promote breastfeeding benefits, while not always being allowed or accepted where mothers are actually nursing at the breast. And we're not choosing formula, so we don't fit in with the formula crowd even though we use bottles. Neither group can quite understand how, or more importantly WHY, we put ourselves through it. While breastfeeding mommas just bring out the breast, and formula mommas just mix up the formula, exclusive pumpers do a time-consuming version of both. It's the equivalent of bottle feeding the baby for 20-30 minutes, then nursing a machine for an additional 20-30 minutes.

Then there's having to explain it to your baby's pediatrician. They track nursing and formula babies on different growth charts, so they get a little lost when you tell them baby is bottle fed but needs to be on the breastfeeding chart. Most pediatricians encourage us to treat the whole thing like we're simply bottle feeding. That means we're told to wean from the bottle around a year old to avoid things like bottle rot and bucked teeth (OWT, btw). We're also told  by every pediatric institution (and by our maternal instincts) to continue providing breast milk to our babies until they naturally wean, just as they would from the breast.

It's a very torn position to be in. So, how did I do it? By listening to my momma gut, guided by common sense and pediatrician recommendations. There's no easy answer, but the answer is simple: using the same cues I would have listened to if she were nursing.

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Some things to look for: How do you know when baby is ready!?

1-Baby starts reaching for solids more often- My girl literally reached into the sandwich I was eating and pulled a tomato out, then started gnawing on it. That was her first real solid food. After that she reached for pizza, carrots, and popcorn. It was her choice. She was 5 months old when it started. Much younger than the suggested age, but it's what came natural to her. After that, every time she showed interest in what I was eating, I offered her a finely chopped or manageable version of my food. Her natural interest in these new textures and flavors let me know she was on her way to weaning. This is a huge part of baby led weaning. Not introducing solids (like mushed baby food or the dreaded cereals) on your schedule, but letting baby tell you when they're interested, and what they're interested in.

2-Baby chooses cups or sippies over the normal feeding method- This also happened before the recommended age- she was 9 months when she started signing for straws in stead of bottles. She was still receiving breast milk in her cups because this was, again, just a sign that she was growing, not a direct indication that she was ready to give up and wean completely. If she were to have been nursing, I would see her reaching for cups in stead of asking for the breast.

3-Baby indicates satiation without having much, if any, breastmilk- This didn't happen until closer to 15-18 months with my kiddo. She'd already ditched the bottle at 9 months when she refused a nipple and signed for a straw or cup in stead (which was right in line with what the pediatrician had suggested anyways), but she always had breast milk in her cup as her drink with every meal. When I noticed she was choosing the solids before the milk, and when she began signing or saying she was full from her real foods without drinking much breast milk, I knew the time was coming. This was the big deal breaker for me. At 18 months I stopped pumping and continued to give her my frozen stock until it ran out.

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How to wean yourself from the pump:

To avoid the pain of engorgement without using any outside remedy to dry up my milk supply, it was about a month of gradual weaning. This is what worked for me:

1-Take 5 minutes off each pumping session (days 1-4). I was pumping for anywhere between 15-20 minutes per side by the time I started weaning from the pump. By limiting myself to 10 minutes I was telling my body there was no need to make that extra bit of milk (just like baby would have done if she'd been nursing).

2-Stop one of your pumping sessions a day (days 5-9). My pumping schedule was four times a day; morning, noon, evening, midnight. So, I stopped the midnight session. This imitated a nursling dropping a nursing session and, again, told my body that it was making too much and to slow down production. I'm not going to lie, there was a little discomfort in the mornings, but our bodies are amazing. There is a chemical in your milk that tells your glands to stop producing when they've reached capacity. Your body will adjust, and by the end of this stretch your body will have adjusted dramatically.

3-Take another 5 minutes off each pumping session (days 10-13). By this time I was at three pumping sessions a day for 10 minutes per side. So, I dropped my time in half and pumped just 5 minutes per side three times a day. It was a strange transition, but by the time I was ready to drop another session (the next step) my supply dropped "almost" painlessly from 10-15oz per side to just 6oz per side.

4-Stop another pumping session a day (days 14-18). At just 5 minutes per side, this new adjustment meant two sessions a day; one in the morning, one in the evening. 12 hours between pumping. My supply didn't drop at this point, but there was no real discomfort between sessions.

5-Stop another pumping session a day (days 19-23). This is the last bit before stopping completely. I learned quickly that there is a SIGNIFICANT difference between 12 hours and 24 hours between pumping! I decided that I'd rather start the day off comfortable, so I kept my morning pumping session and got rid of the evening session. That way I could at least have relief to start my day off. I was pumping 5 minutes per side once a day, but for the first few days I was now getting 7-8oz per side because of how long the stretch was in between. By the last day my supply had dropped to nearly nothing (maybe 1-2 oz...not nearly enough to cause pain or discomfort). That's when I completely stopped pumping.



I went through all the bittersweet emotions that a breastfeeder does, but after a few weeks of grieving, we just simply moved on to the new adventures she had in store for me. If you're going through this, or have questions or comments please share them in the comments below! I'd love to hear from other parents going through this, and to learn how you handled it!